Hey Cats,
You know I love talking about dating especially when it comes to finding love online and having met my fiance online 6 years ago I know it well. One of the questions I get asked a lot about Online dating is “how do you keep the chat flowing and interesting for both of you and stop getting ghosted?” I’m going to give you my tips for being chatty without it being a chore.
Be Honest
My number one advice is always be honest there’s no point pretending to be someone else or trying to make yourself sound way more exciting. You will always get caught out and then you’re not representing your true self. Sometimes you can feel the pressure of not wanting to sound boring so pretending you went out but the person you’re chatting to may love what you thought was just boring. There’s no shame in saying “I chilled out, pampered and read books with snacks” that just sounds like my night of heavenly self care. Equally if you’re chatting to a few people don’t imply that you’re only exclusively talking to one person. Part of chatting to people online is knowing they will be chatting to others as long as your honest and they are it’s not a bad thing at all.
Ask Questions
Getting to know someone is the fun bit and nobody likes one sided conversation. Make sure you’re always asking questions so then they have something to reply back. My biggest pet peeve was a.ways a dead message that hardly said anything and never asked questions. Questions show you’re interested and engaged in getting to know them. Ask what music and films they like or their favourite foods. These are questions that can open so much chat for you, me and my boo hit it off with music and films ... the chat never stopped. Even something as simple as asking how their day went and paying attention to them.
Hang Outs
Like asking questions finding out where their favourite places to go out are will give you an idea of their personality and possible future dates you can go on. You can even get planning one if it’s going the right way. This is great if you are using local dating sites like Buckinghamshire dating site or datebuckinghamsingles.co.uk as you may find out you both share the same favourite restaurant. You should also find out a little about their living situation in as natural way as possible. Do they live with housemates, have their own place or maybe they are still at home with the folks. Never discredit anyone who isn’t where you would desire but also it’s a great way to gauge if you’re on the same page in life.
Be Flirty
Flirting is not only fun but let’s the person know you’re chatting to that you’re interested. If you don’t flirt even a little they may get the wrong message and move on to someone who is responding to them a little more. Flirting can bring out people’s best and worst sides if they jump the gun a little too fast maybe they aren’t interested in chat and are just looking for fun. If you are too then go for it if not be weary of this and take a bit of a step back.
Respect Space
The thing with being online for anything is people expect you to be instantly available to them and aren’t accounting for your mindset, if you have time and just generally respecting your boundaries. This works both ways too, don’t freak out if you see they have been online and haven’t messaged. If you’re anything like me when I get into chatting with someone I write essays. Sometimes people just need time to process and compose a reply. If people step over your boundaries they can be red flags don’t be ashamed to step away from this situation. That’s the beauty of online dating if you don’t want to go on the site you don’t have to.
With all those tips in mind get out there enjoy chatting! What are your chatty tips?
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